Reality Is
by Insidiae
Summary: Doumeki thinks Yuuko is a liar. It's Yuuko's job to set him straight. Oneshot, hints of DouWata.


So as I continue fandom jumping, I find that I have way too many half-assed ideas too deal with. This week's fandom is xxxHolic, so as a first time xxxHolic writer, please welcome me!

Okay, but honestly, the ending to this made me bleh a little. I fail at endings. Also, Doumeki is frickin' hard to write for.

I hope you enjoy!

* * *

Doumeki Shizuka has spent years perfecting his deadpan stare, a skill passed down from generation to generation of the Doumeki family and used for centuries to disconcert possible threats with its unwavering unwaveringness.

Ichihara Yuuko, however, has years and years of dealing with Clow Reed behind her, and at best, is bemused.

She's got to give him credit, though. If she was anyone else, and maybe if she was just a little bit more sober, the look would probably have made her fairly uncomfortable (though that also requires having shame, of which Yuuko has none). Haruka taught his grandson well.

Now if only he'd taught the kid how to smile.

"Doumeki-kun, what a pleasant surprise. What can I do for you?" the witch asks with a lazy grin and drooping eyes.

The young man focuses that deadpan stare on the woman, observing how casually she leans against the dirty wooden fence in a full kimono with a never-emptying cup of sake in her left hand. She's the kind of woman Doumeki can respect, a person with confidence and security in who they are and what they know. But she's also manipulative and controlling, and that thought makes his constant gaze turn to the empty space behind her.

"It's empty again," he says, gesturing to the vacant lot behind the fence. "Your shop. I can't see it."

"Why else would I meet you outside?" she teases, because she knows everything and Doumeki knows nothing and she has the power to do so. "Doumeki-kun has no need of my shop."

Doumeki lets the silence stretch between them, and it's not awkward at all like it is with Watanuki because both he and Yuuko are the type of people who know that quiet is a silly thing to feel uncomfortable about. Thanks to the twins, Doumeki has also learned the power of words, and wants to make sure he doesn't waste a single one. Doumeki is efficient like that.

Finally, he says, "You're lying."

And Yuuko looks like she's about to laugh out loud because Doumeki is so charmingly simple and the complete opposite of Watanuki, and though she has grown rather fond of loud employee/servant, Doumeki's blunt attitude is refreshing different. It offers a whole new way of pushing buttons.

"Am I?" she questions with that drunken grin of hers as she sips from her never-emptying cup. "Are you sure?"

Doumeki's answer is quicker this time, because he's thought this scenario out too many times to not know what he's doing. "You said I don't have a wish, but I do."

"Nope!" the witch giggles, in a way a woman her age shouldn't. "You're wrong!"

"I can't see your shop."

"Correct."

"I have a wish."

"Also true!"

"So…. You lied."

"Like I said, you're wrong," Yuuko replies, and suddenly the lopsided smiles are gone, replaced by a tight-lipped frown. She takes another sip from her sake, and when she looks back at Doumeki, her eyes are crimson steel. "I said you have no use for my shop, not that you don't have a wish."

Doumeki raises an eyebrow. "I didn't realize there was a difference. I thought they went together."

Yuuko smiles again, but this time it is laced with a sad sympathy. "My shop only appears to people who have wishes I can grant."

"I thought you can grant any wish," Doumeki responds a little too quickly, because of all the possible scenarios he's gone over in his head, this one never came up.

"Theoretically, I can," Yuuko offers with a shrug. "But every wish demands a price, and yours is far too big to pay. You could offer me your entire life, and it wouldn't be enough."

Doumeki purses his lips and crosses his arms. "I want him…" he starts.

"I know."

"I wish he didn't…"

"Me, too," Yuuko agrees, "but the price is far too high. For either of us."

And Doumeki lets the silence stretch between them, because it's not awkward at all like it is with Watanuki because both he and Yuuko are the type of people who know that quiet is a silly thing to feel uncomfortable about. Thanks to the twins, Doumeki has also learned the power of words, and wants to make sure he doesn't waste a single one. Doumeki is efficient like that.

Watanuki is not.

"Hey, what's stupid-Doumeki doing here?"

"Ah, Watanuki, finally!" Yuuko greets, waving over Doumeki's large shoulder. "We ran out snacks, and Mokona has been jumping all over the place. Maru and Moro are starving, and sake just doesn't taste the same without them! Please go make more!"

Watanuki stares at her, mouth agape, before shouting, "I am not your servant!" even though he totally is. "Besides," he continues, looking disapprovingly at the cup in her hand, "Yuuko-san drinks too much."

"It's because Haruka-san's wine is so good!" she exclaims, some of the clear liquid spilling out as she raises her cup triumphantly.

At that, Watanuki starts, glancing at Doumeki suspiciously. "More importantly, why is _he_ here?" he inquires with caution. Doumeki being around generally means humiliating and/or life-threatening assignments for Watanuki.

"Oh, don't worry," Yuuko answers, waving her hand dismissively. "Doumeki-kun and I are just having a little chat."

Doumeki nods in affirmation.

Watanuki still looks hesitant, but eventually accepts their excuse. "I guess I'll go make your snacks," he says, defeated, "though Yuuko-san should really cut back on the alcohol." He takes one step and passes through the gate.

To Doumeki's eyes, he simply vanishes.

The archer stares into the empty lot, where he knows in some other dimension a shop exists, a shop that grants wishes. The look on his face is wistful – or at least, as wistful as Doumeki can get – as he gazes at the spot where a boy stood just moments ago. It's a scary idea, but Doumeki thinks that maybe there is nothing he can do to stop Watanuki from disappearing, from simply vanishing into thin air.

"You see, the problem, Doumeki-kun," Yuuko states, breaking him out of his reverie, "is that our wish would change reality. The price for that is simply too high." When he looks back at her, she smiles at the look in his eyes.

_Then I'll do it myself_, they say.

"Can I ask you one thing, then?" Yuuko nods, gesturing for Doumeki to continue. "What is reality? I need to know if I'm going to change it."

Yuuko grins big and opens her arms wide. "Reality is, Doumeki-kun!" She spins around, her arms pointing everything at once. "Reality just is, that's all."

Doumeki nods, because somehow that makes sense, though God knows how. He sighs imperceptibly; he has a large task ahead of him. "I'll bring you more of my grandfather's wine tomorrow," he says, knowing that the information will cost him.

"Oh, that won't be necessary."

"I'm sorry?"

Yuuko smiles, the most genuine expression he's ever seen on her. "Don't worry about it," she says.

"This one's on the house."

* * *

Nrf nrf nrf ending fail.

Comments and criticisms make the authoress happy in her pantalones.

-Insidiae-


End file.
